I'm missing something.

Soooooo today was a pretty good day over all. Went to church which I love so much. Like seriously Rob Bell is soooo freaking awesome! I love Mars Hill lots. Then went home and did stuff in my room...little things here and there that needed to be done but I just never got around to doing. Then I almost was able to go to an ADTR concert but it failed. So I went to Brad's instead where Grant and Michelle came over and we had a grand time playing the kinetc!

I feel like I am totally missing something though. I thought people weren't happy with me and yet I was treated nice. Not like that is a bad thing but I can't help but wonder if it was really cause they wanted to be nice or if it was to cover up what they really thought. Cause it also seemed like I was annoying them too. I'm not sure. Andd with another friend, he totally did talk to me all weekend and then tonight he finally replied back to a text I sent friday with a picture of my re-organized room but apparently he didn't get the picture and he asked me to send it again but I deleted it so I told him I could re-take it at home but then he was just like no night. Like it was so weird. Idk what is going on or what I did but I feel like something is wrong there. Who knows.

I totally lost 5 more pounds. I am happy and almost at my ideal weight...this would be fine too but I rather lose just a tiny bit more. I need to not worry so much about if people think I'm fat or not. I do though. I can't help it. Especially since i gained so much this summer. That made me feel horrible. Now i feel so much better and a little more confident in myself. That is never a bad thing.

I am totally dreading tomorrow. I have to work my two most hated shifts at work again and allll freaking day too. Soooo not happy about that. Plus I forgot I have an ortho appointment and it happens to be during one of my shifts so I have to figure that one out. Maybe I should call in sick. Or maybe I will just like pass out at work from the lack of food and fluids that I have been getting lately. Probably not a good things but at least I wouldn't have to work then...

Well i really need sleep so I am going to go!

Night

Lana Lou